Out In The Open
by NutellaNinja101
Summary: Tony was sure that his friends were determined to give him more gray hairs. They must be having a bet going on, why else would Bruce, a social scientific pariah, Natasha, a deadly ex-ballet dancer/assassin, and Steve and Bucky, wanted men by Hydra and all of the Untied States, all be hiding in his tower at the same time. No Slash!
1. Reunion

Tony was sure that his friends were determined to give him more gray hairs. They must be having a bet going on, why else would Bruce, a social scientific pariah, Natasha, a deadly ex-ballet dancer/assassin, and Bucky, a wanted man by Hydra and all of the Untied States, all be hiding in his tower at the same time. He was ready to help them but God guys could you please not all be wanted people to which the government is watching his every move now? Well, watching him more than usual at least.

Not that Tony would send them away or not want them here, he just had barely enough sanity left since he had lost JARVIS and almost destroyed the world with Ultron. Plus, Hydra and the government were out searching for Steve and his robo cop frozen friend. Tony hardly saw Steve or his friend since they had come to him almost three days ago, most likely trying to help the Soldier gain his memories back. Course, the only reason Steve was here was because Natasha had somehow (meaning Pepper told her) figured out that Tony had located Bucky after months of searching since he had gained the information that the Winter Soldier had murdered his parents from exposed S.H.I.E.L.D files. In Tony's defense, he was looking for the deadly, murderous Winter Soldier who could kill you with his metal pinky finger; not this starving, pale, metal armed twenty-something year old who looked like a five year old could take him out without much work.

Tony had found him in an abandoned bank, the last place where Hydra was confirmed to be. Tony had gotten there with weapons raised from his suit, equipped dangerously and fully expecting (and maybe even hoping) for an epic battle between him and his parent's murderer. Even Steve wouldn't be able to disagree with the Soldier's death if Tony killed him in self-defense…right?

Instead he found Barnes sitting alone in some sort of bizarre metal chair cradling his flesh arm tenderly. Blue eyes raised up and eyed Tony's with indifference, not caring about the Suit's weapons that were faced at his heart. "It's broken." The Soldier whispered in a hoarse voice as he jerked his chin towards his right arm, seemingly unamused at the full power of the Iron Man suit. Indeed it was broken; the arm was longer on the right side then it was on the left, and it was at an odd angle. Most likely it was from when Steve and the Soldier last fought a few months back on the helicarrier.

Tony expected it to be a trick. It must be. The Winter Soldier was a trained assassin, programmed for killing and nothing else. Yet still, he couldn't bring himself to even consider firing upon him. Not at this hurt little kid. God, he looked so young, he couldn't be past his early twenties. Tony could barely remember how he ended up calling Happy to bring his ride over to pick up Barnes and himself, or how he was soon out of his suit and calling Nat. But there he was, sitting on the edge of his couch swishing back his second bottle of beer when Nat had sudden appeared in front of him.

"There's this beautiful invention called knocking. You should learn it." Tony replied emotionlessly, taking another swing at his nearly empty drink.

"Where is he?" Natasha wasted no time asking as she slammed the doors to his office room open with a deafening thud as they bounced against the walls. She wore civilian clothes and seemed to be carrying no weapons, but Tony doubted that was true.

"In that clear Tupperware container thingy that Bruce and I made for the Hulk." Tony continued his drinking, avoiding her piercing gaze. Tony knew that Nat was always going to be on Steve's side and his alone, and because of that, Nat would be on the side of the Soldier, even if this Soldier was the one who had shot her through her side years prior.

"No, I mean Steve. He knows you found him, right?" Nat frowned slightly, already assuming the worst of Tony.

Well, she was right but still, Tony didn't appreciate that kind of assumption.

"He doesn't know yet. And he won't until we know the Soldier isn't going to kill him at first glance. You saw what the Soldier did to him last time they faced off. He nearly killed him, not to mention you and Nick."

"If he was going to do that, _you'd_ be dead already." Natasha responded knowingly as she sat in the chair in front of Stark, not asking for permission as she set her feet up on top of his desk. "You're hoping to get answers out of him about your parents before Steve takes him away." Her strong tone proved that it wasn't a question, it was a statement. And again she was right but damn, when did Tony get so predictable?

When Tony didn't answer, Nat pressed on calmly, almost tenderly. "I know you want answers, and you deserve them Tony, but the Soldier who killed them is not this man; he isn't Barnes. This man is the _victim_ , and you holding him in that cell like he is the monster is just going to make things worse."

"He killed them." Tony's voice was low but it was enough to have Nat stop and listen to his words. "Maybe he remembers, maybe not, but he killed them and he _has_ to pay for that. Not just my parents, but the others that he has killed."

"And you're going to force one of Hydra's own victims to take the blame for what they did?"

"He killed them!" Tony shot up from his chair, knocking back his drink. How could no one else see that the Soldier has killed whatever was left of Barnes and this _thing_ is all that's left. _"Then why didn't he let Steve drown?"_ Said a small voice. Shaking his head, Tony almost screamed at Natasha. "He forced their car off the road and he killed them!"

"Because they brainwashed him." Nat stayed in her seat, unfazed by Tony's outburst. "Steve would not be trying so hard to help and protect someone who you are describing. Yes, the Soldier did that, but that Soldier is not what Barnes is now. I believe Steve and if he says that Barnes is a good man, I will protect Barnes with my life…and no one will get in between that."

The threat was hanging between them like a dagger. Tony scoffed in disgust, plopping back down on the couch with a small grunt, he turned away from Nat's cold stare. "Soldier boy stays in the cell until Bruce and I confirm that he isn't going to attack anyone…but go ahead and call Wonder Boy."

Nat nodded. "That should be good enough for a while, but don't take your time. I'll go call Steve." With Tony's indifferent wave of a hand, Natasha rose from her seat, turning back without a second look at her ex-boss.

In what Tony would have sworn was less than five minutes later, Steve had slammed the door open, despite the fact that last Tony heard, Rogers was nowhere near Stark Tower. "You found him?" Steve panted, holding his wounded side from the Ultron attack that occurred a few days prior. Tony hardly expected to see him so soon after his own creation of Ultron went wild. "Did you find Bucky?"

Tony flinched at the hopeful look on Roger's face. He looked so…tender. It was hard to put into words but Tony looked at Steve's face and saw so much affection in his eyes over the possibility of finding his friend that Tony had to take a second before answering. "Yeah…yeah he's alive." He answered hurriedly after he cleared his throat.

"I need to see him. Please, I need to make sure he's okay." Steve begs. Begging… not something that Tony had ever seen Roger do. Though being in a world that is completely different, having your friend from your old life would properly make thing better.

"He's still dangerous." Tony answered. How could Steve want to see the guy who almost killed him? He has his friend's face but the Soldier was no longer Bucky Barnes. Yet Steve pushed on. "He could kill anyone of us."

Excitement was threatening to burst through Steve's chest as his mind went through the ceaseless chant of _"Bucky's here. He's alive. Bucky's okay and here and I can't lose him again please God please don't male me lose him again."_ "I need to see him-Tony please."

"He's still dangerous, Steve." Tony tried to reason once again, trying desperately to get his pint across. He could understand Steve wanting to see the man that used to be his friend but for the love of God, the Soldier was a killer.

"He's just confused." Steve answered like it was obvious. "He's not going to hurt me. Please let me see him."

Tony had planned on answering and staying firm to his answer of "no"…but somehow Tony finds himself guiding Steve outside of the clear cell that Loki had once been in and observed Steve as he looked like a brother who had finally found his long lost sibling. Bucky was huddled up in the corner of the room by his bed, his hood from his jacket was up and covering most of his pale face. Curdled up into a tight ball, his flesh hand was protectively wrapped around his ribcage and he seemed to have no notice of the two men as his breathing was the only indication that he was still alive.

"Steve?"

Okay, maybe he was more observant than Tony gave him credit for.

Bucky's head was risen up slightly, dark locks swooped around his cheeks as his dark blue eyes locked onto Steve's. His voice was soft, like raising it anymore would hurt him and if Tony is feeling his own heart crack for the Soldier, he can only imagine what Steve is feeling. Either the Soldier was a brilliant actor who was just waiting for the right moment to attack them both, or he was actually this weak.

Steve pressed his hand against the clear glass, his eyes never leaving Bucky's. "Hi Buck." He whispered, seemingly forgetting about Tony being in the room. "Can I go in?" Steve silently implores Stark, giving Tony the image of a lost little kid who finally found his way home again.

Tony found himself unable to bring himself to say no as he flicks the switch up to allow the door to slide fluidly open.

A small look of thank was given to Tony by Steve and soon he was inside the cell, his eyes only for Bucky's. "Are you hurt?' Steve asked, moving forward until he is only a few feet away from Bucky and up close he can see cuts and bruises on his friend's face. Dark shadows and bits of blood are under his bright blue eyes. His flesh arm looks to be in an odd position and his clothes are caked in dirt.

Bucky is edged as physically close to the corner of the wall as he can get though his eyes never look away from the man from the bridge…from Steve. Looking at the damaged arm, Steve kneels down in front of Bucky, closer to him than Bucky would have allowed anyone else to be. Tony brings his hand over to the hidden pistol that is covered by papers, ready to shoot if the Soldier tries anything. And in all honesty, he is hoping that he does attack, just so he can kill the thing that murdered his own family.

"Your arm…does it hurt?" Steve questioned softly, fighting his strong, almost overwhelming urge to pull Bucky's shaking form against his chest and never let him go as long as he drew breath. "I'm so sorry I hurt you Buck…"

Bucky replied in a soft voice that only Steve could hear. "You had to. I was hurting you. I had to be punished." Steve felt like a vice was wrapped around his heart at the fact that he was again unable to stop his friend from being in pain. Slowly Steve starts to reach out to look at Bucky's arm when he flinches. "Don't…I might hurt you again…" Bucky whimpers involuntary after his confession, the pain around his whole body becoming too much for him to stay still and soon his whole body is trembling.

Unable to speak without his voice cracking, Steve settles his fingers ever so gently on Bucky's quivering knee, his thumb carefully caressing the ripped denim that covers Bucky's skin. "I know you won't Buck…I trust you." Bucky looks at Steve's thin fingers that rest fondly on his trembling knee, all the while his eyes start to slowly water, lowering his chin so it rest on his free knee. "Why would you want to help me?" He asked delicately, his voice holding confusion.

"Because you're my friend Buck…I would anything for you…and I know you would do the same." Steve barely moves, or even breathes. He can't risk losing him again. He would leave Bucky alone if he asked but God, please don't make him push Steve away. "I know what Hydra did to you." Bucky swallows thickly for a second and Steve hurries on. "I won't let them hurt you Bucky, I promise. And if you want…I can help you get your memories back, or if you don't want that, I can stay with you."

Steve lowers his head slightly to catch his friend's gaze and finally, Bucky looks at him; his gaze looked almost frustrated as his metal fingers grip his other knee. "But I don't remember you. Why would you help?" How could someone want to help him? He couldn't remember a time when someone helped him heal unless they needed him to go on another mission. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, Bucky could hear a small voice encouraging to stay with Steve, to protect him.

"Because you're my friend." Steve spoke like it was such a simple concept' how could Bucky not understand that he was so, _so_ important to Steve? "You will _always_ be my friend." Steve's fingers still hold firm to his best friend, looking like he wasn't planning to let ago any time soon. And from the look that Bucky was giving him, he didn't want Steve to let go ever again.

And that was the story of how Tony Stark became a free hotel for the damaged and wanted superheroes.

Bruce was already leaving in Stark Tower since the end of Ultron's attack. Having heard of the situation that was at hand, Bruce had soon come into the room after hearing from Nat what was going on and was prepared to help Bucky's injuries, to which Steve had quickly accepted. Tony stepped away to watch as Bucky examined Bruce from outside of the cell with a terrified expression, as if he is just waiting for Bruce to relive himself to be Hydra and take him back. Tony was soon forgotten about as the three men in the cell focused on other things. Steve had his arm around the back of Bucky's thin shoulders and rests his temple next to Buck's, but still Barnes started shaking like a frightened animal while his head is shaking back and forth in distress at the thought of having someone else touch him to the point that Steve looked like he was the one in pain.

Bruce made sure to say nothing to upset Barnes as he was gently wrapping his broken arm in the correct angle with bandages. Bucky turned his head to Bruce who was entirely focused on his task and then to Steve, who was holding onto Bucky in such tenderness that Bucky didn't even know how to deal with it. Bucky makes the slightest noise of protest when Bruce tightens the bandage around his flesh arm to which Steve moves his hand from Bucky's back to the nape of the neck and rubs the back of his neck affectionately and soon he feels the tension slowly start to leave Bucky. "If I am correct," Bruce starts in a soft voice looking at the two soldiers. "Your super strength should have this sling be off in a few days, a week at the most."

"Thank you Bruce." Steve breathed gratefully, his hand going out to rest on Bruce's shoulder appreciatively before pulling back to place it back on Bucky's metal arm comfortingly.

"No thanks needed." Bruce smiled before looking back at Bucky who was staring at Steve with a thoughtful expression on his face. "If you need anything else, I'm in the next floor up."

Unable to think of an answer, Bucky says nothing as Bruce's gets up from his knees and leaves the cell. Bruce walks pass Tony with a small smile yet Tony does not return the exchange. Without Steve having to say a word, he knew that he would have to get Bucky a room, one for both Steve and Bu- Steve and the Soldier.

Tony wasn't exactly pleased to know that the man who had murdered his parents was under his roof. No matter how Steve tried to explain it, Tony just couldn't separate that this man, this Winter Soldier made Tony an orphan was also the war hero who was basically Steve's brother. But that closeness between the two soldiers didn't stop Tony from wanting to storm into Steve and Bucky's room and demanded to know if Bucky knew anything about his parent's murder. Were they killed because of something they knew? Was it in case they ever became self-aware of what S.H.I.L.E.D was? Did they say anything before they were murdered? Did they beg for their lives to be pared? For Tony to be spared? Did they even have time?

Tony clenched his jaw painfully as he turned away from his laptop that he was looking at for work, unable to even focus on what he was seeing. All the answers that he had been looking for while in the same building and it had no memories. Just his luck.

There had to be something that Tony could do to get the information he needed. The Soldier may not have memories but they must be in there somewhere. Buried under the orders and killings, there must be something that he remembered about why Tony's mother and father had to be killed.

And he was going to find out how to get that information.

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

Exactly one week into their new home life Steve was sure that this was the happiest he had been in three years. Even though that Bucky wasn't exactly the same, he was still here, in a way. Bucky had always been his best friend, his brother, and nothing was going to change that for him, no matter what got in their way.

That didn't mean things were any easier for the PTSD ex-assassin. Steve was currently holding a whimpering Bucky Barnes in his arms at three in the morning. The city lights shone through the window to give them some light as Steve tenderly wrapped his arm around the back of Bucky and his chin rested carefully on Buck's floppy hair. Another nightmare of his "dealings" with Hydra, something that has happened every night. The problem was that Bucky can't sleep, he just can't. Steve hardly ever sleep either since he makes sure to stay up alongside of Bucky to help him slowly ease off into a slumber. It does eventually happen most nights but not without a lot of coaxing and whispered promises of how Hydra will never get their hands on either of them ever again. Bucky's programming screams at him nightly to not sleep unless he was given orders from Hydra to do so. Eating has the same dilemma. He was trained and brainwashed for over seventy years to follow their ever command, to do only as they said and nothing else. And then comes along Steve Rogers and the Winter Soldier's world goes completely into ruin…for the better.

Barnes's young face held terror while his metal arm was lying uselessly on his lap, something he always did when Steve would get out of his own bed and hold his best friend tight during the night; it was as if he was afraid of hurting Steve with that arm once again. His flesh arm was now healed after having proper medical care done and it looked like it was never even broken.

Bucky can't help himself from burrowing further into Steve's chest and slowly, his breathing relaxes. Steve can't begin to describe how grateful he is that Buck trusts him enough to comfort him and even touch him. It may look like a small step to anyone else but to Steve it is the best thing he's ever come across since waking up in this world.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Steve's tone was soft yet it still made Bucky jump slightly. Clearly he wasn't completely used to not being barked at or hurt. The thought had Steve force himself to breath calmly. If he ever came across another Hydra agent ever again he was going to-

"I think I'm gonna throw up." Bucky mumbled, pushing Steve away to rush to the bathroom that was directly across from their bed. The door slammed with a loud thud and Steve quickly got up to follow him, ready to be there if Bucky needed it.

The sound of painful retching was heard through the solid oak door as Bucky's nausea won the battle between his stomach and his willpower. Quietly Steve remained outside the bathroom, swallowing nervously in concern and wanting so badly to go in and help in any way he could. After a few more minutes of gasping and moans was heard, the sound of the toilet flush and the sink running was heard and Bucky slowly opened the door, hunched over himself slightly. His bottom lips had water from the sink drip slowly down his chin and he was looking even paler than he was before. "I got sick." Bucky mumbled, his head hung low like a child in trouble.

"That's okay, Buck." Steve slowly reach over to set his hand on Bucky's shoulder; he had to hide the fact that his heart soared when Bucky leaned into the touch. He had stopped trembling but he looked exhausted and Steve had a feeling that he still wasn't used to being able to sleep like a normal person, without the fear of being taken away and being unmade day after day after day. "Do you want to try to go back to sleep?" Steve questioned.

Bucky leaned against Steve body, breathing deeply. "You can." Bucky answered. He didn't have all of his memories but somehow he knew that Steve was just as tired as he was and his own concern for this man who refused to fight him back on the plane was greater than his own concern for himself.

"I'm not tired." Steve quickly lied, watching his friend carefully and holding him carefully in case he got sick again. "I'll stay up with you."

"I don't want to sleep anymore," Bucky muttered forlornly. "I don't want to see the Chair again. I don't want to be alone." His voice wavers at the last statement.

A boatload of questions sprang to Steve's mind over the timid statement but now was not the time to ask Bucky about it. He needed to help him sleep, even if it was for only an hour or two. "Okay then." Steve answered. "I'll stay awake with you."

Bucky's eyes sprang up to Steve's. "You sure?" He asked hopefully, not wanting to stay awake alone in case things got too painful again. Steve somehow had gotten through all his defenses and programming and now he could feel his mind slowly everyday started to stop screaming at him to finish his mission. Steve wasn't his target. He was…he was his friend.

"Of course." Steve smiled and he finds himself pressing his lips to the side of Bucky's temple, much like he did to Steve when he couldn't sleep back in Brooklyn. Bucky unwillingly gives a sigh of relief at the touch and he gives a small quirk of the lips and Steve counts that as a smile.

Neither man sleep for the rest of the night but somehow it still was relaxing.


	2. Out Of The Frying Pan

_I hope you enjoy this chapter! Thank you so very much for the favorites and follows!_

Everyone was used to Tony being in his office where he would built God only knows what and that would do God only knows what. None really questioned him, especially Steve; he was grateful that Tony was letting Bucky stay here, there wasn't any way he was going to try and pry into Tony's business, no matter how strange it was that they never saw Tony anymore.

It had been a month since they've all joined together in Tony's tower. Bruce tried to help Tony but he was pushed away to the point that he soon stopped trying; knowing that if Tony wanted to talk, he would. But when Tony did ask for help, it was to help the new machine he was making.

Natasha found herself either spending time talking to Clint and his family or trying to look up new missions for S.H.I.E.L.D. Not very exciting but maybe that's what she needed for now. Steve and Bucky were never apart. Every day that they left their room, Bucky was directly behind Steve's steps, following his every move, eating only when Steve ate, and slept only when Steve slept. Bucky hardly spoke to anyone else and when he did, he had to look at Steve for permission to speak. It hurt but Steve knew that Bucky wasn't used to being allowed to be…Bucky.

Bruce and Natasha were accepting of Bucky, despite Tony's indifferent behavior. Bruce made sure not to touch him without his permission, even when he had to take off his cast, he was gentle and quiet.

Natasha, a victim of brainwashing also, knew somewhat how to handle one who was suffering like himself. She would watch him subtlety and see whenever Bucky looked overwhelmed or nervous when Steve wasn't there, she would immediately either get Steve or carefully, like he was a child, walked towards him and ask him for how she could help. While Bucky still only trusted Steve with his life, he felt that if Steve trusted these people, then so should he. Though in all honest, he felt a sort of closeness with Nat after she confessed to him her own story during a time when Steve was off with Tony, both of them trying to locate a hidden Hydra safe house. Steve always jumped at the chance to destroy anyone who had anything to do with the torture of Bucky Barnes.

"I was unmade too." She said softly, hovering by the hunched ex-assassin who was sitting down on their living room couch with his whole body shaking. Bucky had been trying to force himself to function without the help of Steve, just trying to be able to act like a normal person without forcing Steve to get dragged down by Bucky's own paranoia. But if leaving his own room without Steve by his side caused him to feel like his heart was getting crushed by a vice then how the hell was he going to ever get better?

"You were?" Bucky asked in genuine curiosity. He had made it to the living room couch before he felt like he was having a heart attack. Still, weeks later after being free from Hydra, he couldn't feel safe since he wasn't obeying their orders.

Natasha nodded. "I was a kid when they took me, made me into a killer." She leaned down to her knee, looking only at his eyes. "I know it hurts, I know it does. You are not weak for being hurt or for suffering after what they did to you." Bucky never let anyone get this close to him that wasn't Steve yet he can't bring himself to back away from her or push her back. "You are a hero." She whispered to him. "And even if you can't see it, Steve does. And I do too."

It's small but Natasha swears that he breathes a sigh of relief at her words. His body ceases it's shaking and color returns to his cheeks. "Does he miss the old Bucky?" He whispered timidly, unsure if he should ask.

"Yes." Natasha answered honestly. "But he still cares for you, past Bucky or present. And I doubt anything can change that for him, ever."

Bucky wasn't the Bucky he used to know but that didn't matter. And Steve would take what he could get. Even if Bucky never gained his old memories, Steve would be there for him, as long as he would have him.

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

It was finished. Finally.

Tony ran his fingers over the metal bed, connect to the many strings that connected to the switch that would set it to work. It was going to work, Tony was positive.

Now he just needed his suspect.

It wasn't going to be easy to get the Soldier to accept this but that's why lying always works wonders. Knowing that Steve was off with Nat getting groceries, Tony knocked on Barnes's door. "Hey, super soldier?" He tried to act calm. Getting nothing from the inside of the room, he tried again. "Steve asked me to tell you about this thing, it might help you. May help your memories come back."

The door unlocked with a click and there stood Bucky, timidly staring the man who gave him a home. "Steve sent you?" He asked suspiciously. He felt guilty for doubting this man's word even though his senses screamed at him to get away from this Stark. But Steve wouldn't let him stay with a bad man…right? If he didn't trust Tony, he didn't trust Steve and he couldn't let that happen.

"Yeah." Tony was an expert liar yet he felt bile pick up at the back of his throat at his own words. He shouldn't give a damn about him, so why did he feel like crap for this? The Soldier is a murder, he needed to answer for what he did. "Can you come now? I just wanted to see if it works before Steve gets back…no sense getting his hopes up."

Bucky held on to the edge of the door like it was shield protecting him from the dangers of the outside world but he was silently forcing himself to go to Steve's friend. He had to trust him, Steve wouldn't leave him alone with someone who was out to hurt him. Steve was not like that. Slowly, as much as he didn't want to, he nodded in acceptance.

Tony felt like the worst person in the world.

A few minutes later, in his office, Tony was settling Bu- The Soldier in the chair that he had made, wordlessly settling the head piece connected to his machine around Bucky's forehead and ensuring that everything was set. Still, Bucky said nothing, though Tony noticed that his breathing grew heavier every minute.

"Do you not want to do this?" Tony found himself asking. What the hell was he saying? He was the closest he had ever been to finding the answers he searched for and he was asking is the Soldier didn't want to do this?

Bucky let out a shaking breath and mumbled "No…it's okay…it just-the chair reminds me of…something else."

Tony had a bad feeling as to what Bucky was talking about, but he didn't ask. "Okay, now this IV," Tony pointed to the needle that was sticking in the vain of his flesh hand. "It will help you sleep while I check to make sure this work."

Bucky eyed him with a peculiar expression that Tony didn't have time to find out what it meant. Slowly as the IV dripped, Bucky's eyes dropped further and further shut. He blinked slowly for the last time before replying in a small tone. "Thank you. For helping me. I know Steve wants me to remember….so thank you…Tony." And finally he fell asleep, looking almost peaceful for the first time that Tony had ever seen him.

And Tony felt like the worst villain he has ever faced.

It didn't take much for it to get powered up, but it felt like it was taking forever since Tony was finding himself more and more unable to convince himself that he was doing the right thing here. His finger stayed hovered over the flip that would send him in. That's all he had to do before he'd finally get the answers that he had been looking for.

So why was he hesitating?

Only those that were in the room would be affected, so only Tony would be able to go in…Buc- _The_ _Solider_ , would be unaffected and with any hope, he had at least some memories inside that head of his.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

Ah crap.

Turning his head with a sigh of annoyance, Tony looked towards the opened door of his office to see Steve, Natasha, and Bruce who all stood outside of the door, just as Tony's finger had successfully flipped over the switch, powering up the machine. "Okay, guys, just wait a second." Tony tried.

"What are you doing with Bucky?" Natasha's tone was accusatory. Steve was looking like he was ready to snap Tony's neck while poor Bruce was looking like he had no clue how he was supposed to react.

"Just leave," Tony begged. "Just give me an hour and I promise-"

Bruce came in first with the other two close behind him. "Tony just turn it off. Okay, Tony, just show me how to stop this and we can talk-"

"I can't!" Tony yelled. "It's already on, just shut the door before it-"

Natasha and Steve showed up, both going towards Bucky to unhook him from whatever the machine was as they ignored Tony's warnings.

The next thing he knew was darkness.

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

Tony wasn't sure what he was expecting. Inside an assassins mind was sure to be full of something, anything…but this was-It was…black. Nothingness surrounded them for as far as they could see. Only Tony, Steve, Natasha, and Bruce were within eyesight of anything. The floor felt solid, the darkness seemed so real, yet they were inside someone's head. None of this felt right.

"Tony," Steve growled lowly. Tony had to fight the urge to step back from the captain's dangerous body language. "Get us out of here _now_. This is not our business and I already told you we'd wait until he gained his memoires back naturally." Tony has a small suspicion that if he honestly didn't have a legitimate reason for not being able to get the four of them out of Steve's friend's head, Tony would have a vinbranium shield wedged down his throat.

"I can't." Tony insisted, noticing Natasha and Bruce looking at the blank darkness around them, desperate to seek some sort of an escape from Buc-the Soldier's head. He got this far and Tony wasn't planning on going back until he got what he was looking for. "I programed it to let me stay in here for at least an hour. Just to get what I needed."

"You programed this untested machine on my friend's head with you in it and you didn't even take the time to create a backup plan?"

Protective mother-hen Steve Rogers was the scariest Steve Rogers that Tony had ever seen.

"When have my machines ever gone wrong?" Tony demanded to know. At Steve incredulous look of "are you freaking kidding me right now?", Tony quickly amended "Okay, but those still worked, even though Ultron did try to kill us…" At Steve's furious rage filled face, Tony decided to pull Bruce down with him, because what else of science bros for? "Bruce made this too you know."

"Why am I your friend?" Bruce grumbled with his hands on his hips after giving up trying to walk anywhere, still joining Nat as they looked for any sign of getting out of where ever they were. "Plus I didn't know what I was helping you make. Okay, back on our situation; where are we?"

"We're in Bucky's head." Steve answered for him, going back to staring daggers at Tony's eyes. Okay, how the heck did he know that?

"How the heck did you know that?" Tony demanded.

"You've been treating him like he's a monster ever since he came out, and Nat told us about the fact that the Soldier had killed your parents."

Tony swung his head to glare at Natasha but her gaze held no remorse.

"Ah." Bruce said calmly, like he didn't feel the Hulk screaming at him to go green. "Naturally. And uh, why are we in his head, may I ask?"

"Ask Stark." Steve growled. Oh crap he said Stark; proof that Rogers was pissed.

Tony looked calmly at them as he replied like it wasn't a big problem. "I made this machine to be able to transport one person's mind into another's." The three of them stared at Tony with a furious enough stare that he felt their scorn from the other side of the room. "One person can walk around the other's person's memories for however long I program it. Just so that you could see what the other's memories are and if they are lying about certain things that they claim not to remember. I started it years ago but that was before-before Iron Man happened. It's supposed to be harmless but I only tested it for one person to be in a person's head, not four people."

"And I'm taking it that four is bad?" Natasha inquired as she stood by Steve's side.

Taking a deep breath, Tony continued forcefully. "There is the possibility that if there are too many people in here for Barnes to handle…he might- _might_ , go braindead and take us with him."

If Steve looked deadly at Tony before when they had just came into here, it was hundred times worse right now.

"So if I understand correctly," Bruce interrupted. "We are stuck for less than an hour of an ex-assassin's mind and we may not even get out of here, and if we don't, Bucky and we could all die or become braindead. Am I missing anything?" He ended sarcastically.

Three sets of eyes glare at Tony as he nods matter-of-factly. "Yeah that's everything." Tony agreed like it was talking about the weather and not the fact that they could all die.

"Stark…" Natasha growled dangerously, not in a place where she could tune out Tony's annoy snarky comments. She had only come in the room to help Steve but she had no idea what was in store for her in a place she had knowledge of.

"Hey, this was just supposed to be me in here, you guys weren't-" But Tony wasn't allowed to finish.

"But you were willing to hurt Bucky!" Steve yelled back. How dare he hurt Bucky, after all he had gone through, Tony was willing to test something out when Bucky had nothing to do with the murder of the Starks.

"It wouldn't have hurt him." Tony insisted. Because it was just originally gonna be one person in here, he'd have been fine…four on the other hand…"

"If something happens to him because of you…" Steve clenches his knuckles painfully as Tony spat out "If something happens to him, it won't matter because we'll most likely be brain dead if we don't get out of here."

Steve stayed silent as his mind wrapped around this source of information. "And Bucky?" He asked as fear gripped his heart over the hundreds of possibilities that could happen to the man who was his brother at heart. What would happen to him if they were stuck here for the next hour? Would he be hurt too or could he function once they were dead? Would he get stuck in a deep sleep or would he be in pain this whole time? Would he feel responsible for their deaths even though he had nothing to do with it? Would he even wake up?

"Why does that matter?" Tony snapped, his anger had blinded him to the fact that Natasha as near him, ready to attack if he tried anything on Steve. "He isn't Bucky Barnes anymore!"

"Even if he isn't, that doesn't mean you can use him like an experiment and just throw him away when you're done!" Steve quickly defended his friend. He understood why Tony wanted this; it would some sort of closure that he always needed on why his parents were taken away from him. But as much as Steve understood, Bucky was his friend, his brother, and Tony hurting him like this had Steve feel an anger that he hadn't felt since was taken away from him all those years ago, back on the train. "I asked you to wait-I know that sucks but you should have waited for him to remember!"

"And what if he never does?!" Tony roared back. He did what he had to do. He could have killed Bucky many times but he didn't; doesn't that prove anything? Even though the Soldier was a killer, he allowed him to stay under the most likely false hopes that he could become the old Bucky Barnes. "What if he's stuck as half killer, half Barnes forever?! What if you never fix him?!"  
"Then I'll take care of him!" Steve yelled back. Bruce turned his head towards Natasha, at lose for what to do. But before anyone else could speak, the black room warped suddenly, making Bruce and Tony jump slightly but left Nat and Steve on the defensive, waiting for an attack of some sorts.

It was like a glitch in a computer; frenzy but you could still see something that looked normal past the blurry lines that was hiding it. Then just as quickly as it appeared, it cleared up, revealing an alleyway. It was old, full of trash and boxes that were either packed full or empty.

"Look." Natasha said; getting the attention of the three men, jerking her chin towards the end of the ally. The way out of the ally was empty, only parked cars were seen on the sides of the buildings. But it was the cars that got their attentions: they were old fashion cars, maybe 40s style at the latest.

"Where are we?" Bruce wondered out loud.

"Bucky's memories." Tony whispered. "It worked."

"Will it hurt Bucky if we move?" Steve asked as he examined the old alleyway that he remembered by heart. The same alley he had always gotten dragged into when he picked fights with the morons who did something stupid.

"No, he'll be fine." Tony answered as he stretched his hand out to touch the bricks. His fingers glazed right through it. "Okay so we can stand but we can't touch." Tony replied to himself. "Where is this place?"

"It's a few blocks from our place." Steve whispered, his eyes glued on the old shutters and trash filled ally like it was gold. "I used to get beat up here…almost every day." He scoffed almost fondly at the trigger his past.

Almost as if the ally heard him, skinny Steve Rogers came crashing into the alley with a loud grunt of pain, causing Bruce to squeal suddenly in surprise. There lay pre-serum skinny Steven Rogers, panting slightly as a trickle of blood dripped down from a fresh cut in his cheek. Sitting up, skinny Steve stared at the end of the alley, obvious to the figures that were in Bucky's head. Their Steve stood directly above his younger self, mouth fallen open in shock. "Holy sh-"

"Hey Rogers!" Sneered a voice. All four of their heads snapped up at the voice and there in front of the alley stood a whopping six foot unfamiliar boy about seventeen who apparently had a thing for beating up those who were less than half their size.

"Who invited the Slytherin?" Tony held his hand out towards the boy in disgust at the almost painful stereotypical bully image.

"William Renner." Steve scoffed in almost attachment. "He used to beat the crap out of me on a weekly basis."

"For no reason?" Bruce inquired, completely intrigued in this real life autobiography that was happening in front of him.

"Sometimes. Usually though because I would try and get him to stop from yelling in the library." Steve stared at the boy in disbelief, ignoring Nat muttering "Such a boy scout" under her breath. "I thought I'd never see that little piece of crap again."

Before William could take another step closer to the fallen Steve, a hand appeared over the corner of the end of the alley, grabbing William by his collar and dragging him over with a small yelp from the bully whose eyes widen with surprise at the sudden attack. After a few seconds of painful grunts and screams occurred hidden by the alley walls, a young man step forward with hardly a scratch on him. He looked familiar but Tony couldn't place it until he heard their Steve gasp slightly.

It was Bucky.

But he looked unlike what Tony had seen him before. Granted, he had never seen pictures of Bucky Barnes before he became the Soldier, but this was not what he had expected him to look like. He was attractive, tall, about Steve's size now; he held himself in a tall, confident manner. His clothes were old looking but still in good condition; only the flecks of dirt were any sign of the fight he had just had. His dark hair was carefully parted to his left side. His piercing blue eyes held a sort of smugness and at the same time a tenderness as he stared at his fallen friend.

"What did this one do?" Bucky drawled casually as he stepped forward steadily, holding his strong hand out to gently grab Steve's skinny one, carelessly pulled his friend up without any hassle. His eyes subtly looked at his friend up and down to search for any sign of major injury. Natasha mentally thought to herself that Bucky did that like he had done that a thousand times before. "Said he supported Hitler?"

"Nah, he said you were intelligent, and you know we can't have the town believing lies like that." Skinny Steve replied with a sense of this kind of banter happened on a regular basis. Bucky laughed with such brightness that even Natasha's mouth dropped slightly in shock. This is what Bucky Barnes was once upon a time: a protective, sarcastic, carefree man…before the Soldier killed him.

Tony turned his head to search for their Rogers and he watched him as this exchange played out. Steve looked at Bucky with a feeling in his gut that hurt like a punch. Lost in his own thoughts. Hydra took this Bucky away from him…they weren't going to take the new Bucky away ever again as long as Steve still lived.

Skinny Steve laughed painfully as Bucky slapped his hand on the back of his shoulder after seeing that he was okay, a small cloud of dust flew off him at the contact. "Well this jacket's ruined." Bucky signed like a mother, examining a rip off the side that Steve had gotten after his most recent fight. "You hurt too badly?" Bucky asked. A frown of concern shaped Bucky's face when Steve didn't answer right away. "Are you hurt? Is your asthma working up?" Suddenly fear overtook his handsome features. "Can you breathe? Do you need water? Should I-?"

"Buck." Steve sighed, seemingly like he was used to this concern although not annoyed by it. "I'm fine, really." He insisted.

Bucky breathed a deep sigh of relief and kept his arm wrapped around Steve's skinny shoulders protectively, like he was daring anyone to try and take him away from him. "Next time, please tell me ahead of time before you get yourself killed, I kinda don't want to lose you. Who else could I bring on double dates?"

Steve scoffed, shoving half-heartedly away at Bucky. "You're such a jerk."

"Shut up punk." Bucky smiled back, his arm still around Steve as they walked off outsider of the alley. "Come on, I'll buy you a new jacket."

Then, just like that-it was gone.

"What happened?" Steve asked, looking around the blackness again. Natasha joined him in the search although it was obvious that the memory had ended. "Where did it go?"

"It's the Soldier's memories." Tony answered. "It must just be whatever memories that he has gotten back, no matter how little they are."

Bruce turned towards Tony with a frown in his face. "So this is only what he can remember, then why did you make this in the first place? You have no idea if he would remember what he did to… you know." Bruce ended awkwardly. This is so not how he was planning to destress for his weekend at Starks. Tony was his friend, but how could he do something like this? Why would he just allow himself and force Bucky to go through something with no real assurance that it would even work?

"Any chance that he could remember was good enough for me." Tony shrugged, ignoring the glare that Steve sent his way. As soon as they were out of here, Tony was sure that a punch was due his way back at home.

Once again, a scene unfolded before them. This time in a new place. They were on top of a mountain, covered with snow. "What's this?" Bruce turned to Steve.

"Remember when I made you ride the Cyclone on Coney Island?" The voice of Bucky directed their attention towards behind them. There stood five men, Steve and Bucky, all standing over a cliff and staring at a long zip line down a steep mountain. Steve's face suddenly went deathly pale but no one was looking at their Steve.

"Yeah, and I threw up?" Answered the Steve from the past, leaning over the cliff with Bucky on his left as the zip line hovered dangerously as the icy wind swung it back and forth ominously.

"This isn't payback, is it?" Replied Bucky skeptically as he raised his eye brow.

Steve grinned at the remark playfully. "Now why would I do that?"

"I can't watch this." Steve, their Steve whispered, taking a step back from them.

"Steve, what's wrong?" Natasha asked, reaching her hand out to level with Steve's trembling shoulder.

"This is-this is when he falls."

Tony snapped his head again towards the dark haired boy, smiling softly as he listens to his final direction unknowingly. The carefree boy who would pick off bullies who attacked his punk little friend that fought with anything that moves…that boy was just standing there by his best friend's side…no idea that his life, everything that made him James 'Bucky' Barnes, was to be taken away from him. Bruce and Natasha were looking at Bucky as well, the same thoughts racing through their heads.

"I can't see this, please I can't watch me fail him again." Steve is mouthing his words now so only Natasha can understand him. Steve is looking at himself and Bucky, almost as if he couldn't see anyone else but the man who was close to him as a brother would be. It breaks everything in Steve, to watch Bucky. Just standing there with no idea that Steve is going to get him killed. His eyes were never leaving Bucky's and Tony could have sworn that he could hear Steve's heart break.

"I don't know who to stop it, Steve…" Tony whispered, remorse tearing through his heart. He just wanted answers…not this…

Natasha looked over at the cliff and watches as the Commandoes and Steve slide down silently down the zip line. Before they even knew what was happening, they were on the train. No warning, they were just there…and Bucky was holding Steve's shield as he stood over his friend's fallen form…protecting him for the last time.

"Please God not again…" Steve whispered by Nat, and not even she can offer any sort of comfort. "Please not again."

A shot is fired directly at the shield sending his one source of protection out of his reach and Bucky goes flying out a hole in the train door, barely holding on to the broken piece of bar that is threating to fall. Past Steve takes out the man who fired upon Bucky and is quickly by the broken door.

"Bucky!" The Steve screams, the amount of fear in the one word tears through them all like a knife. The sound of the wind has Bruce subconsciously feel the chill. "Hang on!" past Steve screams as he starts sliding on the broken door, his hand reaching out desperately to grab Bucky's searching ones. Bucky's other hand has a good grip on the handle of the door but it's creaking dangerously. Past Steve is looking at Bucky with determination, so sure that he can save Bucky just like all those years of Bucky saving him; saving him from bullies, the loss of his parents, from all the pains and misery that Steve had encountered in his short life, Bucky was always there to help him out of it.

But Tony looks upon Bucky's terrified eyes and sees resigned acceptance mixed in with his fear.

He knew he wasn't going to make it.

And he wasn't going to drag Steve down with him.

"Grab my hand!" Past Steve screams, his face is full of terror, his hand reached out, barely touching Bucky's freezing hands as he inches forward-closer-closer-

But Steve is barely able to walk without slipping and Bucky can see that, and he knows that Steve would risk his own life to save Bucky even if it meant that he could fall. Just before the sound of breaking metal is heard, Tony could swear that Bucky lets go before the metal breaks….not wanting to take Steve down with him. Bucky falls with a scream.

His hand stays outstretched towards Steve's gloved fingers, even though the four unseen figures know that he cannot be saved.

Steve screams.

Bucky screams.

Then only silence fills the cold mountain.

Bucky falls and that Bucky never rises again.


	3. And Into The Fire

_I hope you enjoy the new chapter! Thank you again for the feedback!_

Steve doesn't remember when he started grabbing at Tony's throat but he finds himself unwilling to let go. He was the reason he had to relive this moment, this memory where he failed Bucky and left him for dead…

Natasha and Bruce are yelling at him as the world around them goes black with the last bit of Bucky's memory of the train ends. Bucky's scream still rang in their ears even after the image was long gone.

"Steve-" Tony gasped, feebly trying to push away Steve's fingers as they tighten around him. Natasha is still pulling Steve away from Tony with no success, screaming Steve's name, trying to make him stop while Bruce is attempting the same, again with no avail.

"You son of a bitch. You did this." Steve growled like a madman as his fingers closed down tighter on Tony's neck, showing no sign of letting go anytime soon. "You got us stuck here and now I may not see Bucky again."

"I'm sorry Steve." Tony whispered. He didn't mean for this to happen…he just wanted…closure. He wanted answers. He wanted…anything but this. "I didn't mean for this to happen…honest to God, Steve…"

Steve's hold didn't weaver, obvious to Natasha's and Bruce's hands that were only barely able to drag him away. He never hated Tony until this very moment. But he understood why he did this. Would he do the same if he were in Tony's place? Maybe…

Steve lets go with a step back and Tony falls to the nothingness that is the ground. He gasped painfully, rubbing his throat with his hand as Bruce scrambled to his knees and puts his hand on Tony's arm. "Can you breathe okay?" He asked his friend, genuine worry in his tone. This wasn't how he planned to spend his day but that didn't means that 1940s superheroes could go around choking his best friend.

"I'll live." Tony mumbled, unable to answer with a sardonic comment this time. Steve is standing over the both of them, staring at Tony with an odd expression while Nat sets her hand on Steve's shoulder comfortingly. She didn't know what he was going through, Clint is her best friend and he is like a brother to her, and while he was brainwashed, he wasn't thought of as dead. He wasn't tortured for years and years while she couldn't save him. He wasn't there while she grew up, saving her from fights or feeding her when they didn't have enough money for food. She loves Steve like a brother but there is nothing that she could say to help make any of this easier.

Even when Steve had nothing, he had Bucky. She understood now just how much he meant to Steve. Bucky was just as responsible for Captain American as Steve Rogers was.

None of them expect the next image to appear and Steve wears to God that he would take all the torture known to man, have his heart being ripped out of his chest while he still was alive, force himself to be taken in by Hydra and be brainwashed for the rest of his life than have to watch this.

Bucky's eyes are closed almost peacefully while he lies on the white terrain at the end of the mountains, the sound of the train in the distance…and his left arm is gone. Completely. From his shoulder to his fingers is now just a bloody stump, blood oozing out unstoppable as his breathing continues somehow regular. His face is scratched up from the fall and his leg looks to be at an odd angle, clearly it was broken.

Then his eyes snap open.

"Oh God." Natasha puts her hand over her mouth, the words falling unwilling past her lips as they all watch in horrified union as the scene that ends only in one way. She rarely allowed her own emotions to be shown, to allow people to see anything that she felt but this was different. She was watching someone's life be taken away from them, to have what made them unique snatched away and replaced with something that was used only for destruction.

Blue eyes hold confusion, pain, and fear all together. He uses his right arm to support himself up then his tries for his left arm and falls to his side, a loud gasp of pain escaping his mouth. He looks at his left in hurt, unsure why he couldn't get up until he eyes rest on the stump that is now his left arm. His mouth opens in horror and his unbroken leg gives what looks like an involuntary kick. "Wh..." He tries but he can't finish, the pain becoming too much and he falls back to his original position, sprawled on the cold ground without any sign of help and his Steve Rogers going further and further away with Zola, unknowing that Bucky was somehow still alive. The realization was in Bucky's eyes as every painful gaps he is able to wheeze out becomes closer and closer to a sob.

Then his eyes start to fill with tears.

Steve, their Steve, walks towards the image of Bucky; his figure slouched over as he watched in agony the silent tears that fall from his best friend's face, trailing down his cheeks before freezing. Bucky's mouth his trembling in a silent scream; knowing that he wasn't going to be saved. Steve lies on his knees, his eyes never leaving Bucky's blue ones. Wearily, Steve's hand goes out, going in by his friend's frozen cheeks to wipe away the tear but his fingertips goes past the bloodied flesh, and Bucky was unable to feel the comfort.

"Stevie I don't want to die here." Bucky whimpers softly. Their Steve jumps slightly at the mention of his name and he looks almost hopeful for a split second, as if maybe he could be seen and help him, save him, trade places, anything if it meant that Bucky could be okay. He would take his place in a second and no matter what happened to him, he would gladly take it if it meant that Bucky would be safe.

But Bucky didn't see Steve. He didn't see Bruce, Nat, or Tony. He only saw the obvious…and that was that he was going to die, here, alone, in pain, in enemy territory. And no one was coming back for him. Not for a dead man.

"Steve…" Tony tries to say-what? What could he even say?

But Bucky saved him from having to make up a reply.

"No." He growled. With unknown strength, he flips over to his side, grunting in hurt as he sticks out his right arm and tries, God help him, tries to crawl. Steve never takes his eyes away from the broken form of his best friend. "I'm not dying here. I'm _not_ dying here. Nobody is killing me in a place that ain't even America." He pushes his free leg forward and grabs snow to pull him forward. Bruce feels like he's going to be sick as he watched the blood trail start to fall more steadily as Bucky starts inching his way anywhere but here. He gets only a few more inches before he stops. Too weak to move, to breath, Bucky can't bring himself to move and he falls unconscious, face first in the snow.

And the scene ends.

And Steve pukes.

"How can you puke in a dream world?" Bruce asked more to himself as he watched Natasha rub calming circles on Steve's back, comforting him silently as he gets it out of his system. "I left him behind." Steve said the words like they were the foulest things that ever went past his lips. "I left him to be tortured and I didn't even go look for his body…"

"Steve, there was no way that you could have known." Natasha answered soothingly, continuing her circles.

"He'd have gone back for me." Steve said with conviction. "He would have looked even if he didn't expect to find anything…and I didn't."

"It wasn't your fault." Tony surprises even himself with his answer. "No one could have survived through that fall, not without your serum and even then you might have died."

"If Bucky survived that fall with only a poor excuse of the serum, I could have too…" Steve said in a low voice. "I should have fallen too. I should have saved him."

"Please tell me the hour is almost up." Bruce hissed at Tony, the painful memories starting to hurt at him as well. This wasn't something that he could handle without feeling anger towards Tony as well.

Before Tony could answer, the memories were once again visible.

Bucky was curled up into a corner of an unknown room. It was dark and wet looking; it seemed to be some sort of cement cell. Their attention back on Bucky, they watched as his flesh arm was cradling his side as he breathed heavily, the coldness in the air causing hi breath to fog up. He was already found by Russians the looks of the metal arm that was chained together around a pole in the floor of the cold, seemingly abandoned building.

And he had been there a while. His hair was longer. Not as long as their current Bucky's hair was but it wasn't nicely kept and combed like the old Bucky would have kept it. Small stubbles of facial hair were growing as well and it slightly hid the thinness of his cheeks and if that didn't show how skinny he was getting, the lack of a shirt did. His bones were visible to a painful degree as one could easily count his ribcages. Bruises, cuts, and blood were scattered randomly on him, untreated and growing infected; yet Bucky stayed on his knees, staring self-assuredly at a figure that sat in front of him.

A man was sitting in a chair in front of him. He was unfamiliar but he had the Hydra symbol on the left side of his shoulder. He was warmly covered in wool and fur and was staring at the defiant Bucky Barnes. Leaning towards the man, Bucky returned the stare with hatred but said nothing.

"вы повиноваться?" The man asked, seemingly in a tone that proved that this wasn't the first time he had said this to the American.

"In your dreams." Bucky spat with vigor at the man's face, falling back as the simple act left him in exhaustion. The Russian man didn't bother to wipe the spat from his face. Instead, a smug smile appeared on his face. There was a short stillness for all of for all of five second before a deafening slap was heard as the man. Bucky leaned over to the side at the aftermath of the punch, laughing slightly as he was used to the punches and kicks. Nat had to hold Steve back even though they both know that there wasn't anything he could do. Bucky was alone in this fight.

After a sneer from the Russian man, he rose up, surprising the four heroes. Even Bucky looked confused as the man stood up facing away from his victim and reaching into his coat's pocket to grab an unseen object.

"You still believe your friend, your Captain, will come back for you?" The man's accent was thick but it didn't hide the fact that he was planning something. Something that would prove whatever Bucky's reply to be incorrect.

"He did before." Bucky smiled haughtily, no doubt in his words and the thought made Steve feel sick once again. He thought he was coming back for him….he thought he would find him, like he did at the 107th…Natasha looked over at Steve but didn't ask for an answer…all she could do was focus at the scene that lay before her and knowing the ultimate outcome. "And he'll do it again. I can't wait to see the look on your faces when he comes here for me."

The man turned again, holding the object from his pocket in his hands. "Do you believe it now?" He asked, throwing the object at Bucky's feet. Barnes looked at the man with a small flicker of fear and Tony leaned over to get a glance of what it was. It was a stack of papers, newspapers to be exact. Tony wouldn't have noticed what it said until the Bucky slowly reached for the paper with his flesh hand and Tony heard Bruce swear under his breath.

" _Captain America: Killed In Action. Hero Being Mourned By All."_

"No."

The simple word sent daggers into Steve's heart.

"No…" Bucky's voice was ripped apart. Completely raw like he had been screaming for hours. He fell onto his flesh arm as his metal arm still stayed in its place, hanging from the chains. Bucky stared at the newspaper cover as he gulped past his sobs and opened his mouth in a soundless scream. Nothing was heard but it still was enough to send even the strongest man to tears.

Tony thought that fighting with the hulk for the rest of his life would hurt less than this did.

"Steve…" Bucky sobbed, not noticing the man left the room since his mission was complete, closing the door with a loud thud. That was their winning card. No one was looking for their asset. He was alone…and he had nothing to fight for. His friend was dead and the war was over. He would soon obey them. Sooner or later, Hydra knew that their puppet, their Winter Soldier would be born.

"Stevie I'm so sorry…Steve I'm so sorry…" He wept uncontrollably, his body shaking with the force of his sobs. "I should have been there….I should have protected you-Oh God please I'm so sorry Steve. Stevie I'm so sorry…"

Steve was watching opened mouth, tears falling unabashedly as he watched his best friend grab the paper and hold it against his heart, weeping bitterly like the news had stabbed him in the lungs. "I should have been there to protect you… I promised you to the end of the line…" He stops there, unable to go on as he rocks himself back and forth, his body still shaking with the force of his agonizing cries. All he could do was whimper and sob as he was left alone

…and eventually he would become Hydra's puppet. Their own little toy that they could break or fix with the simplest actions. Having nothing to fight for, nothing to hope for, one's strength would soon be chipped apart until there was nothing left.

Except for the Winter Soldier.

And that was the end.

The hour was up.

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

Tony popped his eyes open with a loud gasp and he sat straight up. Looking to his side, he watched at Natasha, Steve, and Bruce all did the same. The machine stopped. It had been an hour.

"Bucky." Steve whispered as Barnes became the first and only thing that he needed to see; getting up quicker than anyone had ever seen him move before. Bucky still laid on the chair that Tony had designed, he laid there moving slightly as the drug started to wear off. His blue eyes started opening slowly as he felt someone grab his arm in a worried grip.

"Steve?" Bucky questioned as he groggily watched while Steve unhooked Bucky from the machine like it was sucking the life out of him and gently took out the IV from his vein. When did he get here? Bucky didn't think that he remembered anything more about what happened to him back when his was Steve's old Bucky Barnes. His heart sunk as he realized that it didn't work. Once again he had failed Steve.

"Are you okay?" Bucky asked when Steve finished pulling him away from the chair, feeling his own legs wobbly slightly. Buck suddenly felt fear settle into his gut at the look on Steve's pale face. Here Steve held a tortured, brainwashed, longest prisoner of war known to man and he wanted to see if Steve was okay.

He really was Bucky.

His Bucky. Broken and hurt and taken apart from the monsters that he had once fight against but still, he was Bucky. He may deny it but he still stayed with Steve and that was good enough for him. No matter what memories he had or didn't have, no matter if he becomes a whole new person entirely, he was always going to be his Bucky.

Steve couldn't answer his friend, he couldn't. All he could do was throw the head piece as far away from his brother as fast as he could and pull him against his chest, burying his face in Bucky's hair and shaking, his soft sobs muffled by Bucky's brown locks. Bucky froze for exactly a second in slight fear at the unexpected touch before he wrapped his arms around Steve's back and held him close to him, confused but not leaving his friend's side. He would ask him what was wrong later. Right now, he knew that Steve needed this. For once, maybe he could comfort Steve.

Steve's shaking slowed down yet he refused to let go. "It's okay Steve." Bucky whispered, his flesh hand gently rubbing up and down Steve's back, remembering what Steve did for him when he himself had a nightmare. "You're safe." His voice stays low and soft, the feeling of comforting Steve was like a muscle memory and he doesn't give any sign of pushing Steve away from him.

Bucky didn't ask about why Natasha, Bruce, and Tony were all in his lab, or why they were staring at him like they had never seen him before. He just closed his eyes and held on to Steve with all his might. After a little while, he hears the sound of footsteps walking away and felt the emptiness of the room expect for the two of them.

They didn't let go for hours.


	4. At Peace

_Thank you so so SO much for all the kind words! You all make my day! This will be the last chapter of this fic, but thank you again so much for the support!_

Steve hardly left Bucky out of his sight.

He had already been acting fiercely protective of his friend but after…after the incident with Tony and that damned machine, Steve couldn't even fathom the option of having Bucky ever leave his side. Nat and Bruce would come in and talk with the two of them in the room that belonged to Steve and Bucky. They would talk and laugh, and all made sure to include Bucky in the conversations. Nothing about what had happened but Steve appreciated that; they were supporting of Steve and Bucky and Rogers felt so grateful to know that if worst came to worst, he had allies on his side.

Which Bucky in all honesty, didn't mind at all. Steve had told him about what happened, and how Tony had betrayed his trust. Buck didn't mind that as much as the fact that the bit of memories that Bucky did have of the old Barnes had reduced Steve to being so brokenhearted.

"I didn't know you remembered the train." Steve questioned in a soft tone the day after the occurrence. They were sitting in their separate beds, watching but not observing the film that was on TV.

There was a short silence as Bucky thought about the right thing to say. "I didn't want to upset you." Bucky replied, turning his head towards Steve. Bucky could see that Steve carried so much guilt, so more remorse for things that he could not change; Bucky couldn't bring himself to tell Steve about his new memory, not if it would hurt Steve all over again. He was new to this whole regained protective feeling but Bucky would die for Steve. Not because he felt like he should but because he wanted to do whatever he could to ensure that Steve would never get hurt again. In fact, the only reason he was even upset at Tony was because his deed caused Steve pain.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Steve asked, facing his body towards his friend's. He forced is voice to stay calm, not wanting to have Bucky feel that he had to lie in order to have Steve feel needed.

"It wasn't your fault." Bucky whispered. "It wasn't." Bucky insisted when Steve shook his head slightly. "I remembered that feeling, the feeling before I fell. And I felt relief." When Steve stared in confusion, Bucky clarified. "Relief that it wasn't you who fell. I remembered that I knew you would do anything to save people, and I couldn't let you fall too." Bucky paused for a moment, allowing the words to sink in. "And…I didn't want you to feel like you had to stay here with me. I know I'm not your Bucky, so I didn't want you to stay unless you wanted to…I don't think I'm worth that."

Steve felt like having open heart surgery while wide awake would hurt less than this. "Buck…I am always going to feel guilt for not being able to save you because I love you. You're my best friend, my brother…then and now. I don't care if you never get your old memories back, will always care for you."

Bucky stayed silent for exactly five second before getting up from his bed with determination and grabbed onto Steve like he was his lifeline. Bucky had never initiated the embraces first, never wanting to do something unless he was sure he was supposed to but this time he had no doubt that the both of them needed this.

Steve held Bucky's form against his own; his one arm wrapped around Buck's back and the other on his waist. Bucky's metal arm clung carefully on the fabric of Steve's shirt and he buried his head against Steve's collarbone. The strong beat of Steve's heartbeat was calming and real; leaving Bucky feeling safe, feeling like he was home. "Thank you Stevie…" He whispered, holding on to his tighter.

"Anytime Buck." Steve rocked their bodies back and forth softly, both men feeling at peace.

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

No one talked to Tony for four days.

Nat was on Steve's side of this silence and even Bruce who was still helping Tony through his grief over his lack of answers over his parent's death was still not in a talkative mood. Needless to say, none of them would talk or forgive Tony until Steve and Bucky did first.

Pepper came home from her business trip for Stark Industries to find new guests in their home and they all seemed to be avoiding Tony like the plague. And being the women that she was, Pepper knew that it most likely was something to do with her boyfriend's decision to do things without her permission.

"What did you do?" Pepper asked after three hours of the whole tower being silent and acting indifferent towards Tony.

"I made a mistake." Tony answered, his goggles over his eyes as he continued repairing the latest dent in is Iron Man suit.

"And how big is this mistake?" Pepper crossed her arms knowingly, waiting for his reply and not planning on leaving until he answered her. She loves Tony with all her heart, she always will…and that's why she needs him to tell her what's wrong. Shutting each other out has proven to do more harm than good.

"Big." Tony answered, still refusing to look at her until Pepper set her hand on his shoulder and he just signed. "My parents were murdered."

"I know Tony…" Pepper replied softly. "You told me this. And you told me who killed them."

"But I didn't tell you that I found him." Tony's voice was barely over a whisper. Pepper stayed silent but Tony could feel her hand stiffen. "I used the old machine on him…the one with the memories." Pepper closed her eyes knowingly, her heart hurting as she understood where this story was going to end.

"Did you get the answers you were looking for?' Pepper asked, not leaving his side. When Tony shook her head, she signed. "That wasn't the way to get them anyway."

"I know…" Tony whispered. "I wanted- I needed to blame him for this. For years, I thought that they were just gone…the time was taken away from me and I had nothing to hate for them being gone…but with him- I had a face, I had a person to blame. I had _something_ …finally after all these years, I had someone to hate…but I can't…not when he was just as much as a victim."

Pepper nodded as she listened. "And now you see that he doesn't deserve this."

"No, he doesn't." Tony signed, knowing what she was going to tell him to do.

"You think maybe you need to go tell him that?" She asked, sensing his reply before he even had time to answer. As soon as he forgave Barnes for doing something that he had no control over, the sooner everyone in the tower would forgive Tony...

"Why do you have to be so smart?" He scoffed, a small smile on his lips, never taking his eyes off of hers.

"I'm your girlfriend, I have to be smart." Pepper answered smugly. He would soon tell her the whole story about what he had done to Barnes, but until then, she would help him in any way she could.

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

Tony left Pepper with a kiss to her cheek and went to the level of the tower that he knew Steve and Bucky were staying in. He had to find them and he needed to tell them what he knew he should have done already.

It didn't take long for him to see them in the living room on that level, both sitting on the couch as Steve was holding out a photo of what looked like Central Park. "And what do you have to do at a park?" Bucky asked confused.

"There's nothing you _have_ to do at a park." Steve answered calmly. "We could go this week, if you want."

Bucky looked at the picture, then back at Steve the corners of his mouth pulling upwards. "I think I would like that.

Steve beamed at his friend's reply until he looked up, noting Tony standing there, then his smile faded and he glared at Stark with anger. Though it wasn't hatred, so Tony counted that as a win.

"Please, just give me two minutes." Tony asked, keeping his hands up in a form of surrender. "I just want to talk to the both of you."

Steve hung his arm around the back of Buck's shoulders protectively. He watched Tony stand in front of them and Steve's eyes narrowed with suspicion. He hadn't spoken to him in days and he didn't feel exactly keen on starting now.

"I didn't mean for all…of that to happen." Tony said, never breaking eye contact from Steve. "I'm sorry."

The words, while simple, seemed to have impacted Steve. He looked at Tony curiously, almost like he was looking for a reason not to believe him. Bucky turned his head from one man to the other, waiting for one of them to say something. While he was told by Steve what had really happened the other day, he didn't feel anger towards Stark. He was used to being taken advantage of, though he doubted saying that would help Steve forgive Tony Stark for breaking into Bucky's memories.

Bucky stared at his friend with tenderness. He knew Steve; maybe not as well as the old Bucky, but he knew Steve enough to understand that he wouldn't hate Tony. Steve sighed, his grip on Bucky's shoulder loosening some. "I know Tony." Steve answered. "I'm sorry you didn't find the answers you were looking for.

"If that's what it would have taken to get my answers, it wouldn't be worth it." Tony replied in all honesty. Steve smiled softly, knowing that Tony was telling him the truth. Seeing those memories…well that hurt like hell. He knew that Tony hadn't planned for this to happen to any of them but it didn't change the fact that he had done it…had forced them to see what had broken his best friend.

But Tony was a victim as well. Not like Bucky but he was also hurt by what the Soldier had done. Tonyhad protected them despite the dangers of having the two of them in his home. He cared for them. Steve cared too much for Bucky to easily forgive Tony for what he had done to Buck but that didn't mean that he never would. Bucky would always come first, that would never change, and now Steve had Bruce and Nat on his side. But...maybe what Tony saw was not what he wanted, but what he need. To see that Bucky was a victim, a prisoner. Steve loves Bucky with every fiber of his being and he couldn't allow something like this to happen again to Buck.

Maybe what Tony had done would help him in a way though...he needed to see Bucky for how he was: a hero who was pushed to his breaking point and needed help finding his way back. Steve would help in whatever way he could but it would't hurt to have help.

Maybe this could workout after all…

MARVELMARVELMARVEL

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Steve asked Bucky again for what felt like the tenth time in that hour.

Bucky nodded softly, secretly grateful for Steve's closeness. It was till hard for him to do anything without advice but Steve was making things easier and easier as the weeks went by. "I think so…but-but could you stay here? Just so I know you're not far?' He knew that the Soldier side of him should feel disgusted at the sense of weakness but the Bucky side of him, the one that was growing stronger every day, said otherwise.

Steve smiled gently. "Of course." He patted his friend's shoulder encouragingly and left Bucky to make the first move to Tony, who was currently lying on the couch in one of his many living rooms, looking at his laptop not moving or sensing a new presence in his room. He didn't notice the metal armed form until Bucky cleared his throat nervously. Tony's head snapped up in surprise. Bucky looked down at his own intertwined flesh and metal hand, unsure how to even begin but knowing that Tony needed this and since he was Steve's friend, how could Bucky deny Stark anything?

"I loved science." Bucky blustered out in haste. When Tony continued to look confused, Bucky went on, lifting his eyes to face Tony's. "I mean before. Before the war, I remembered I loved to learn all about anything that had to relate to it. When I wasn't researching, I was writing about it. I think I wanted to write short stories about science fiction." Bucky scoffed at the memory. "During the war, after I met your father, he would let me watch when he experimented." Bucky gave a small smile. "Howard was kind to me. He helped me understand what he did. He was my friend."

Tony stayed silence during Bucky's longest running speech. He hung on to his every word. Bucky forced himself to continue. "I don't remember anything more about Howard…I just remember that he was kind. And he protected Steve, so that was all I needed to know. I'm sorry I can't remember more….but I know that he was my friend."

Tony felt like an entire weight was lifted off his shoulders. This wasn't what he was looking for, nor was it what he wanted to hear…but it was what he needed to hear. Barnes was Howard's friend. His father cared for him and Steve. He would never have blamed Bucky for what the Soldier did….because they weren't the same person; not like how Tony had thought.

"I know it's not much…" Bucky said softly. "But it's all I remember." He looked back at his hands and started off when he heard the small reply.

"Thank you."

Tony's voice was soft enough that Bucky almost missed it. But it was there. Bucky smiled to himself as he stood by Steve's side. A year ago he would have never done anything like that, but a year ago, he didn't have Steve, or a home, or this messed up but kind family. Steve gently brought his hand over Bucky's back soothingly as he and Bucky walked back towards their room.

"I'm so glad you're here Buck." Steve whispered, placing a soft kiss on the side of Bucky's temple, something that Steve had been doing as a sign that he was proud of him. Bucky couldn't stop himself from grinning at the touch.

"Me too Steve."

He was home.

 _The End_


End file.
